I once owned a house up in Running Springs and I loved it. When my marriage failed, we lost the house and I moved into my in-law's garage. I was very grateful for their kindness, but to go from a two story house of my own to a garage that barely held me and the kids (Isaiah and Abby), it was quite depressing. A few months after that I had the opportunity to rent a house. It was small (about as big as the garage), but it had it's own bathroom and I no longer had to let people in to do their laundry. I was VERY grateful. A couple of years later I married Becky and we moved into a two bedroom apartment. That sounds small (and it was), but it was still so much bigger than the previous place.
A year and a half after that, we started renting the place we are in now. It has 4 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms! It doesn't have air conditioning and the house is constantly falling apart, but (again) we are so grateful because it is that much better than our prior situation. We have been renting here for 3 years. It gets really hot in the summer.
All 4 1/2 years of our marriage, Becky and I have been looking for a house to own. Every time we find one, the deal falls through for some reason or another. And we've had LOTS of deals fall through. Lots of doors closed. We've prayed and searched and searched and prayed to the point of emotional exhaustion - throwing our hands into the air to ask "WHY?" when we can't find our permanent place. We've felt like nomads. And yet, all the while, God has taken care of me. Time and time again, He has blessed me and my family with something better. And so, a year ago we decided to stop grumbling like the Israelites and to start praising God for what He has done. We realized that God wants us HERE. So we asked God to give us a clear, obvious sign when it is time for us to move. And in the meantime, home is where the heart is and our hearts are with God.
A couple weeks ago, our property manager told us the owners are selling our house. We have 60 days to vacate. Our first reaction was to get all huffy and offended and start freaking out a bit. After all, we had looked for a house for years and couldn't find one. How are we supposed to find one in 60 days?! But then we realized that this was God telling us that it is time. That means He must have a house ready!
We started looking immediately. We looked at 6 houses the first day. We never had any other days of looking. As a matter of fact, the first house we looked at is the house that accepted our offer. In the past, deals have fallen apart because we are using a VA loan which requires the seller to pay closing costs. This time, the sellers chose us BECAUSE they want to help a VA family. In the past, the inspection has found major problems with the house. This time, it was virtually flawless. In addition, there have been little ways that God has allowed for me to see (behind-the-scenes) to know that this is His direction - without a doubt. Nothing that is a deal breaker, but eventually enough coincidences pile up to where you can't label them coincidences anymore.
On April 24th, Becky and I are moving our family of 6 to Beaumont - to yet a bigger house - one that is ours - with air conditioning! And we just can't praise God enough!
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
Things Don't Always Happen for a Reason
Things don't always happen for a reason. Sometimes they do. Sometimes I can see God working. Sometimes I can see forces attacking. Sometimes I can see nothing, but later I can look back and see how it all came together – like some sort of behind-the-scenes documentary. But sometimes things just happen. And I don't mean small things. Sometimes life altering things happen and it has nothing to do with Heaven or Hell. When my dad got cancer I heard all sorts of people telling me this was a spiritual battle and we had to fight back with prayer. My dad died almost 12 years ago. It wasn't because God lost, or Satan won, or we didn't pray hard enough, or because God intended my dad to suffer and die. He just had cancer and died.
That's not to say that God wasn't there all the way. He kept our spirits from shattering. He kept us from falling apart. He put my dad to sleep in a coma for weeks while going through the worst of it. And then he allowed him to wake so we could all say our goodbyes. Even my dad spoke of a general who would come to him at night and ease his pain. God was always there. As a result, my perspective on death completely changed. It's not “the end”.
Every action movie in Hollywood is about fighting to stay alive. Death is always the worst thing that can happen. We must never stop running or fighting, from the humans to the animals to the insects to the viruses. To live is the most important thing of all. This is ingrained in us because we are of this natural world. But we are also spiritual. And because of that, death is okay. An old busted suitcase doesn't mean that the luggage inside will be thrown away with it. This is what God taught me when my dad left us.
Everyone in my family (my sisters and my mother) all learned things from this dreadful situation. We all grew, and were shaped and reshaped. Did God take my dad away to teach us lessons? Absolutely not. But He used the situation for our own growth. And because we held on to Him, He showed us where life blooms in the desert.
That's not to say that God wasn't there all the way. He kept our spirits from shattering. He kept us from falling apart. He put my dad to sleep in a coma for weeks while going through the worst of it. And then he allowed him to wake so we could all say our goodbyes. Even my dad spoke of a general who would come to him at night and ease his pain. God was always there. As a result, my perspective on death completely changed. It's not “the end”.
Every action movie in Hollywood is about fighting to stay alive. Death is always the worst thing that can happen. We must never stop running or fighting, from the humans to the animals to the insects to the viruses. To live is the most important thing of all. This is ingrained in us because we are of this natural world. But we are also spiritual. And because of that, death is okay. An old busted suitcase doesn't mean that the luggage inside will be thrown away with it. This is what God taught me when my dad left us.
Everyone in my family (my sisters and my mother) all learned things from this dreadful situation. We all grew, and were shaped and reshaped. Did God take my dad away to teach us lessons? Absolutely not. But He used the situation for our own growth. And because we held on to Him, He showed us where life blooms in the desert.
Monday, February 3, 2014
Spidey 2002 vs. 2012
Last night I rewatched The Amazing
Spider-Man. I admit that I originally watched it with a closed mind.
I enjoyed it well enough. The action was great, and Garfield's
Peter Parker was actually pretty great. Gwen Stacy and Captain Stacy
were also solid matches. Rhys Ifans was okay as Dr. Conners, but for
a villain he was fairly forgettable. I don't blame him for that.
The Lizard was never a very compelling character for me in the comics
as well. Pete's mechanical web shooters is straight from the comic.
And his costume feels more real.
This morning I watched the original Sam
Raimi Spider-Man. I will admit that Garfield plays a better Peter
Parker than Maguire. The Spidey of the comics is funny and charming,
but only to the readers (and the audience). To everyone around him,
he is a great big loser. Maguire plays it all as a loser. Garfield
plays it charming, with the director making him a loser to everyone
else. This works well for The Amazing Spider-Man, but it's probably
the only point that is genuinely stronger. Raimi's film is just more
engaging. The origin flows better. The colors and editing are more
fun and comic- booky. It has more comedy and a better villain.
Elfman's musical theme is much more heroic and catchy (if you need a
super-hero theme, call Danny Elfman). J.J.J is such an integral part
of the mythos. The fact that he was left out of the new one is the
biggest misstep in my opinion. JJ is Spidey's constant foil that he
can't actually take out or put in jail. And he is Peter Parker's
ONLY source of income. I missed JJ quite a lot. So as far as the
origins go, Raimi made a better Spider-Man. Don't get me wrong. I'm
still plenty excited about the new one coming up. It looks much more
cinematic and comic-booky. And I'm really looking forward to seeing
Garfield as Parker again.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Great Eagles of Middle Earth!
I've been hearing lots of talk lately about what everyone perceives as the BIG FLAW of Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit. It always comes back to the eagles. Why didn't the eagles just take the ring to Mount Doom? Why didn't the eagles just take the dwarves to the Lonely Mountain? I'll explain why this doesn't happen, but first I'm going to give you some background on the Middle Earth pantheon.
The god of all Middle Earth is called Eru. He sent the Valar to create the world. The Valar are basically “high angels”. The head of the Valar is Manwe. He is the Valar of the air. The Great Eagles (giant eagles) are his personal servants. We are in the 3rd age of Middle Earth. Man was created in the 2nd age. Elves were created and ruled the 1st age. Melkor (a.k.a. Morgoth) was the one Valar who rebelled and became the “Satan” of this world. The lesser demons that followed him were called Balrogs. Sauron was one of these lesser angels. In the 1st age (and even before, when no intelligent life was on Middle Earth) the “angels” and “demons” were constantly warring over Middle Earth and each epic battle would reform the surface of the earth. The last time this happened was at the end of the 1st age. Whole nations of elves were destroyed by landmasses being relocated to the bottom of the sea. “God” said that enough was enough and forbid the Valar from ever interfering in Middle Earth again. The good thing is that Melkor was finally chained forever in outer space. Most of the balrogs were destroyed or buried (Sauron being one that laid low for quite a while).
The Valar saw Sauron gradually coming to power but they couldn't do anything about it. So they helped by sending 5 “lesser angels” called Maiar to Middle Earth so help fight battles not by using their great power, but by influencing mankind to make the right decisions and teaching them to defeat the great evils on their own. Gandalf was one of these maiar (though the people of Middle Earth called them istari or wizards). The 3rd age was ending and man would inherit the earth from the elves, so it was important for them to figure out how to stand on their own and not be so dependent on gods and elves. This is why Gandalf VERY rarely uses epic powers. When he went up against that balrog in Moria, it was like two Maiar squaring off against each other.
The other ace that the Valar kept in Middle Earth were the Great Eagles. They were the spies for Manwe who would tell them what was going on. And very rarely, at the last possible minute, they would help Gandalf if he needed it. Gandalf, after all, was a direct maiar of Manwe himself. This is why they would show up when they would and it is also why it was so important for them not to just take the ring to Mordor or help out with menial dwarvish quests. Man will not attempt to step up and accomplish great and wonderful things for the world if he knows God or the angels will do it for him.
I feel this applies in our own world as well. We blame God for the evils that exist in this world that He “loves”. But what we should be doing is drawing inspiration and courage from Him and standing up to do great deeds for our world. What goes on in this world is in our hands. I've heard it said that God is love, yet too many of us sit back getting all the love without passing any on. God (Who is love) created us in His own image. It is time we start living up to that image.
The god of all Middle Earth is called Eru. He sent the Valar to create the world. The Valar are basically “high angels”. The head of the Valar is Manwe. He is the Valar of the air. The Great Eagles (giant eagles) are his personal servants. We are in the 3rd age of Middle Earth. Man was created in the 2nd age. Elves were created and ruled the 1st age. Melkor (a.k.a. Morgoth) was the one Valar who rebelled and became the “Satan” of this world. The lesser demons that followed him were called Balrogs. Sauron was one of these lesser angels. In the 1st age (and even before, when no intelligent life was on Middle Earth) the “angels” and “demons” were constantly warring over Middle Earth and each epic battle would reform the surface of the earth. The last time this happened was at the end of the 1st age. Whole nations of elves were destroyed by landmasses being relocated to the bottom of the sea. “God” said that enough was enough and forbid the Valar from ever interfering in Middle Earth again. The good thing is that Melkor was finally chained forever in outer space. Most of the balrogs were destroyed or buried (Sauron being one that laid low for quite a while).
The Valar saw Sauron gradually coming to power but they couldn't do anything about it. So they helped by sending 5 “lesser angels” called Maiar to Middle Earth so help fight battles not by using their great power, but by influencing mankind to make the right decisions and teaching them to defeat the great evils on their own. Gandalf was one of these maiar (though the people of Middle Earth called them istari or wizards). The 3rd age was ending and man would inherit the earth from the elves, so it was important for them to figure out how to stand on their own and not be so dependent on gods and elves. This is why Gandalf VERY rarely uses epic powers. When he went up against that balrog in Moria, it was like two Maiar squaring off against each other.
The other ace that the Valar kept in Middle Earth were the Great Eagles. They were the spies for Manwe who would tell them what was going on. And very rarely, at the last possible minute, they would help Gandalf if he needed it. Gandalf, after all, was a direct maiar of Manwe himself. This is why they would show up when they would and it is also why it was so important for them not to just take the ring to Mordor or help out with menial dwarvish quests. Man will not attempt to step up and accomplish great and wonderful things for the world if he knows God or the angels will do it for him.
I feel this applies in our own world as well. We blame God for the evils that exist in this world that He “loves”. But what we should be doing is drawing inspiration and courage from Him and standing up to do great deeds for our world. What goes on in this world is in our hands. I've heard it said that God is love, yet too many of us sit back getting all the love without passing any on. God (Who is love) created us in His own image. It is time we start living up to that image.
Friday, January 10, 2014
My first CAT scan!
Had my CAT scan today. They gave me a GIANT berry smoothie to drink 45 minutes prior to the appointment. I've had my fair share of Jamba Juice. This was NOT a berry smoothie. And when I showed up at the hospital, they gave me more to drink. Their product will not be getting an endorsement from me. They had me lay down on this platform in front of what I can only describe as a “Stargate” portal. In fact, the whole room felt like I was preparing to board Space Mountain at Disneyland. After 15 minutes of vigorously slapping my arms, they determined that I was vainless and had to bring over yet another expensive looking piece of technology that they called “the vein finder”. Once they located their prey, they jammed an IV into my hand and told me to pull down my jean shorts. I still don't quite know why that was necessary, but whatever. Needles in arms, and pants around ankles, the platform that I was lying down on started moving forward towards the Starcraft portal. I was certain that any minute it was going to shoot me forward like the Matterhorn Bobsleds, and I actually braced myself for that to happen, but it never did. I did get to see laser lights all over the inside of the portal, and a friendly robotic voice told me when to breathe and when to STOP breathing. The technicians told me to prepare for the iodine that I would get through my IV. Next thing you know, my ears got really hot – like I was wearing some sort of earmuff/heatpad contraption. Well, that's weird. My crotch is also really hot. Kind of like.... OH CRAP! Did I just pee myself?! Is this one of those adverse reactions that I skimmed over?! I try desperately to see if my undies were wet, but the techs keep telling me not to move. So there I am with my pants around my ankles, unable to move, wondering if I just paid a $200 copay to use a $300,000 piece of sci-fi equipment as a toilet. Luckily, I kept my bladder in check and the sensation was simply that. They told me I was done and I took off out of there like I had robbed the place. Good times.
Thursday, December 19, 2013
My first ultrasound!
I had my first ultrasound today. It was weird. I’ve seen quite a few, but to be the one lying down with my shirt up was bizarre. You know, cuz I'm a guy. I kept wanting to ask the tech if she could tell what the sex was. The process took over an hour. She had to get pictures of every single abdominal organ, and I guess I’ve got bunches. She wasn’t gentle, especially on my ribs. I learned things about myself. Did you know that I’m still ticklish? I thought I outgrew that. But it’s been awhile since I’ve had to lie on my back, unmoving while someone vigorously digs into my ribs. I kept my cool. I didn’t laugh. But it took all my concentration not to start giggling like I’m 8 and Kimberly is pinning me down. Me: “Stop it! It hurts! I can’t breathe!” Kimberly: “It can’t be that bad, if you are laughing so hard!” I thought those days were behind me. So there I was, focusing with all my might to not burst out laughing. I focus best with my eyes closed. At one point I realized I was closing my eyes with a huge smile on my face. So now I look like some big perv who is enjoying his ultrasound way too much. I open my eyes to see her giving me an odd look. I could explain, but the whole process is awkward enough without my opening my mouth to say something stupid. So I just try to forcibly stifle my smile which of course quickly comes across like a contorted scowl. She asks if I’m okay. I mutter, “yep”. Come on, lady. I just want this over with so I can get out of here with my dignity. Hurry up and finish and give me a towel so I can clean this goo off my stomach. Overall, I rate the experience better than the dentist, but worse than a tattoo. I suppose it would be more positive if they were looking for a baby and not abnormalities.
Saturday, December 14, 2013
My Review of The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug
Okay folks. I’ll write a couple of paragraphs without spoilers and I’ll let you know when I venture into that territory before whipping them out. I watched The Hobbit: DoS yesterday and it was excellent. It was a fun roller coaster ride, but it reminded me how lucky we are with how the Lord of the Rings trilogy turned out. Desolation of Smaug is indeed better than An Unexpected Journey, but nowhere near the level of quality of the Rings trilogy. This is to be expected because you could say the same thing about the books. The stakes are not high enough. Although there are major chess pieces being moved around all over by Gandalf and Sauron, it’s all just a bunch of wins or losses in battles. The great war has not yet begun because neither side realizes that the One Ring of power is a player. Once everyone realizes it exists in LoTR, it’s a huge “all or nothing” war to the finish. But as far as our primary characters in the Hobbit movies know, this is simply an adventure.
As I re-read my review, I see that I do an awful lot of complaining. I really did enjoy this movie. It was a lot of fun and has a special place in my heart because it’s a journey back to Middle Earth. But it seems the things that stick out in my head are things that I have issues with. I’ve tried not to compare it to LoTR, but it seems impossible to me. And therein lies most of the problems. The styles are so completely different in these films than in LoTR – especially in this one. The action starts right off from the get-go and keeps going until the last shot. There is no long sequences of lingering in Hobbiton or Rivendell. I like this approach, though it can feel sometimes exhausting. The camera swoops around like we are watching the action from a cyclone. Everything is so completely over the top. The only way that I can wrap this stylistic change around my head is to think of these movies as coming from the exaggerated narrative of Bilbo Baggins himself. We know from AUJ that he wrote this story and is telling it in his own manner. With that in mind, I kind of like the dramatic change in style, though it makes me grateful that we will always have LoTR. We continue to get very little drama and character development in DoS.
I’m sure you’ve seen Legolas from the trailers. One of the things Becky mentioned to me was how Legolas lacks the subtlety in his character this time around. Subtlety. That is what is missing from every single scene. Nothing is left open to interpretation. Every glance is in your face. Every action is spelled out by the character’s themselves, for fear that the audience may not be able to come to their own conclusions. As I watch this, I am reminded of my reaction to The Phantom Menace as I compared it to previous Star Wars films. Okay. I must apologize for that. Peter Jackson is still at least a competent storyteller (though that may be in part because he is following the source material provided by Tolkien). But let me give you an example of the action. Remember in the LoTR trilogy when Legolas would get one huge over the top moment in each film to be Errol Flynn on steroids? This time, he does that in EVERY ACTION SEQUENCE. Every time he and Tauriel are on screen, they are spinning and sliding like they are living in the Matrix. It’s really cool at first. But then it just gets old. Give us Christmas once a year and it is magical and fun and beautiful and fantastic. Give it to us every single day, and it becomes just like every other day in the year. Subtlety and restraint.
Now I’m going to get into some spoiler territory. If you think it’s okay because you’ve read the book, you are dead wrong. PJ ventures FAR off the path of the novel. Most of it I am okay with, but there are a couple of additions that made me quite angry.
The first thing we get in the movie is Beorn. Beorn is a cool guy. He is the last skin changer in the world and he can turn himself into a bear. In the book, Gandalf says “This guy is dangerous and we don’t want to anger him so I’m going to bring you guys in two at a time to watch carefully how he reacts.” In the film Gandalf says “I don’t know. He might help us. He might kill us. Everybody rush into his house all at once!!” And they do. They storm Beorn’s house, screaming all the while, and then lock him outside. What?! Once Beorn shows up in human form, we get about 5 minutes with this fantastic character before we are rushed out to the next set piece.
Gandalf leaves, and Bilbo and company head into Mirkwood. Mirkwood was done wonderfully. The spiders were lots of fun. And guess what? They talk! My 12 year old argued last week that if the spiders talk like they do in the book then this series is ruined for him. I understand where he is coming from. The Hobbit book is full of talking animals, but LoTR is not. He wants to see this filmic world follow the rules that it previously established. Well, the cool thing is that Bilbo really only hears their thoughts once he puts on the ring. It makes sense because these spiders are creatures of the shadow and are drawn to the darkness that Dol Guldur has brought to Mirkwood.
Speaking of Dol Guldur, from what I remember it’s all the way at the bottom of Mirkwood. And Mirkwood is huge, Dol Guldur is several hundred miles away. And yet, multiple characters make it there and back in no time at all. I guess the laws of time and space don’t apply to a world compose of CGI. And that’s another thing that bugged me a bit. The LoTR orcs looked fantastic with their make-up and prosthetics. Lurtz and Gothmog were especially creepy. Sometimes I would just want to pause the movie and marvel at them. Not so much in DoS. PJ keeps giving us orcs with CGI faces. Why? They don’t look cool. They just look like CGI faces!
I’ve read some reviews where people had problems with Gandalf using major powers in Dol Guldur. Gandalf isn’t supposed to match power with power. As an istari, he is forbidden. And yet here, he appears to pull out some pretty big guns. But I don’t really see it that way. He uses a spell to reveal a glamour, and what appears to be some sort of force shield/bubble. The force shield itself is more like pure light that is holding off pure dark. That’s reasonable to me. If he used that spell on any other creature, it wouldn’t do much but brighten it up or maybe scare it away like he did with the ringwraiths outside of Minas Tirith.
One of the things I enjoyed the most was PJ’s inclusion of a completely invented character, Tauriel. It’s Kate from Lost playing an elf. I liked her a lot. Every time she was on screen and not fighting, she brought great emotional depth to a film that lacked great emotional depth. She is actually in it a lot, and though Legolas is in it just as much, his role felt like nothing more than a cameo next to hers. However, once she shows up, PJ starts changing the story. She and Kili begin this crazy elf/dwarf love-at-first-sight storyline that I have major issues with. I’m most conflicted with this, because it doesn’t feel forced. It feels right. And yet, it’s an ELF and a DWARF! Maybe I just need to let it go and accept that times are changing.
Laketown was so much more fully realized than I had ever imagined. I loved it! But once again, PJ strays far from the source material. Bard’s black arrow isn’t an arrow at all, but a harpoon. Bilbo doesn’t save the day by revealing Smaug’s one weak spot. Bard reveals this info to Bilbo. Four of the dwarves stay behind in Laketown while the rest go on to Erebor Yeah, they’ve come all this way facing death defying odds at every turn but now that they have made it practically to the doorstep, they stop. Who cares about seeing their ancestors home? Laketown is so much prettier this time of year with their fish and fog and animosity towards dwarves. Bofur stays behind because he slept in. Kili hurt his leg. Fili won’t go without Kili. And Oin is just….um….old?
Kili, by the way, is dying from being shot in the leg with an arrow. And the only ones who can save the day is Tauriel and Legolas. Plus Laketown gets invaded by orcs, so the elves get to do some more Matrix style killing.
And here is the thing that hurts me the most. Tauriel saves Kili with a handful of Kingsfoil. Kingsfoil? Aye, it’s a weed. Yep. The same stuff that Aragorn used to save Frodo in Fellowship of the Ring. In Fellowship, Arwen came to him after Aragorn administered the poultice and she looked all glowy and beautiful. I always assumed that was because Frodo was close to darkness and was now approached by an elf of the light – Elrond’s daughter, Galadriel’s granddaughter. Arwen is from a race of elves that has seen the light of the original sun and moon in the Blessed Realm (aka elf heaven). But guess what? Kili sees Tauriel in the same mystical glowy fashion. Tauriel is a lowly Sylvan elf. Their claim to fame is that they live Mirkwood. Technically, Thranduil and his son, Legolas, have some Sindarin in them which is a mix of light and dark elves. But Tauriel should be strictly Silvan – otherwise known as dark elves who haven’t seen the light of the Blessed Realm. That leaves me to conclude that Kili was just high, and Frodo was experiencing the same effects. But that’s not the part that kills me. Athelas, also known as Kingsfoil, is a common weed that has NO medicinal properties unless administered BY THE HANDS OF A KING. This is why Aragorn was able to heal Frodo with it. In the book, it is one of the major ways that he uses to prove that he is the true king. This is why people never thought of it as anything more than just a weed. So in PJs world, it is all over the place, but NOBODY knows it’s healing properties even though ANYONE can use it to heal? THIS MAKES NO SENSE and it’s the number one thing that frustrates me with this movie. Seriously. This is as bad as Lucas’ midichlorians. PJ moved too much stuff around on this perfectly stable tower just to make it his own, and this is the block that makes his Jenga tower topple.
The final 30 minutes involve not just Bilbo, but the dwarves entering Erebor and confronting Smaug. They create this huge overly elaborate plan to kill the dragon once and for all. It turns the dwarves into Matrix fighters as well, as they practically fly through the halls, coming close to meeting their end dozens of times. Thorin boogie boards down a river of molten gold. Finally, the gather all the molten gold together and cover Smaug with it. I’m not sure what it was supposed to do. Burn him? Nice try doing that to a heat proof dragon. Drown him? Well, he’s got wings so he just flies right out. Maybe they expected it to be more quick drying and turn him into some sort of golden gargoyle. But he just shakes it off like a wet dog. This whole final 30 minute sequence was the most boring part for me. It was all CGI and it just kept going on and on and on. Jumping down stairs, flying on ropes, crashing through walls. Fire, fire, fire. It sounds exciting, but it almost had me nodding off like I was watching the podrace from Phantom Menace. Noisy. Dark, except for blinding flashes of fire. And constant moving without really comprehending what was going on. When the movie finally concludes, it ends so abruptly that I was almost shocked. Action! Action! Action! And then roll credits. No quiet moment reflecting on the adventure or character growth.
I’m going to be seeing this a second time next week with my kids and my father-in-law. Typically, a second review will tell me how I really feel. I’ll get to judge the movie on its own merit instead of my expectations. I enjoyed Iron Man 3 more on my second viewing. On the other hand, I hated Phantom Menace and X-Men 3 even worse. As I think about watching it a second time, I feel excited. So I couldn’t have disliked it too much. And maybe after seeing the extended version, I will enjoy it even more. I remember having HUGE problems with Two Towers until I saw the extended version. Until then, don’t take my word for it. Go see the movie. Becky said she loved every minute of it.
As I re-read my review, I see that I do an awful lot of complaining. I really did enjoy this movie. It was a lot of fun and has a special place in my heart because it’s a journey back to Middle Earth. But it seems the things that stick out in my head are things that I have issues with. I’ve tried not to compare it to LoTR, but it seems impossible to me. And therein lies most of the problems. The styles are so completely different in these films than in LoTR – especially in this one. The action starts right off from the get-go and keeps going until the last shot. There is no long sequences of lingering in Hobbiton or Rivendell. I like this approach, though it can feel sometimes exhausting. The camera swoops around like we are watching the action from a cyclone. Everything is so completely over the top. The only way that I can wrap this stylistic change around my head is to think of these movies as coming from the exaggerated narrative of Bilbo Baggins himself. We know from AUJ that he wrote this story and is telling it in his own manner. With that in mind, I kind of like the dramatic change in style, though it makes me grateful that we will always have LoTR. We continue to get very little drama and character development in DoS.
I’m sure you’ve seen Legolas from the trailers. One of the things Becky mentioned to me was how Legolas lacks the subtlety in his character this time around. Subtlety. That is what is missing from every single scene. Nothing is left open to interpretation. Every glance is in your face. Every action is spelled out by the character’s themselves, for fear that the audience may not be able to come to their own conclusions. As I watch this, I am reminded of my reaction to The Phantom Menace as I compared it to previous Star Wars films. Okay. I must apologize for that. Peter Jackson is still at least a competent storyteller (though that may be in part because he is following the source material provided by Tolkien). But let me give you an example of the action. Remember in the LoTR trilogy when Legolas would get one huge over the top moment in each film to be Errol Flynn on steroids? This time, he does that in EVERY ACTION SEQUENCE. Every time he and Tauriel are on screen, they are spinning and sliding like they are living in the Matrix. It’s really cool at first. But then it just gets old. Give us Christmas once a year and it is magical and fun and beautiful and fantastic. Give it to us every single day, and it becomes just like every other day in the year. Subtlety and restraint.
Now I’m going to get into some spoiler territory. If you think it’s okay because you’ve read the book, you are dead wrong. PJ ventures FAR off the path of the novel. Most of it I am okay with, but there are a couple of additions that made me quite angry.
The first thing we get in the movie is Beorn. Beorn is a cool guy. He is the last skin changer in the world and he can turn himself into a bear. In the book, Gandalf says “This guy is dangerous and we don’t want to anger him so I’m going to bring you guys in two at a time to watch carefully how he reacts.” In the film Gandalf says “I don’t know. He might help us. He might kill us. Everybody rush into his house all at once!!” And they do. They storm Beorn’s house, screaming all the while, and then lock him outside. What?! Once Beorn shows up in human form, we get about 5 minutes with this fantastic character before we are rushed out to the next set piece.
Gandalf leaves, and Bilbo and company head into Mirkwood. Mirkwood was done wonderfully. The spiders were lots of fun. And guess what? They talk! My 12 year old argued last week that if the spiders talk like they do in the book then this series is ruined for him. I understand where he is coming from. The Hobbit book is full of talking animals, but LoTR is not. He wants to see this filmic world follow the rules that it previously established. Well, the cool thing is that Bilbo really only hears their thoughts once he puts on the ring. It makes sense because these spiders are creatures of the shadow and are drawn to the darkness that Dol Guldur has brought to Mirkwood.
Speaking of Dol Guldur, from what I remember it’s all the way at the bottom of Mirkwood. And Mirkwood is huge, Dol Guldur is several hundred miles away. And yet, multiple characters make it there and back in no time at all. I guess the laws of time and space don’t apply to a world compose of CGI. And that’s another thing that bugged me a bit. The LoTR orcs looked fantastic with their make-up and prosthetics. Lurtz and Gothmog were especially creepy. Sometimes I would just want to pause the movie and marvel at them. Not so much in DoS. PJ keeps giving us orcs with CGI faces. Why? They don’t look cool. They just look like CGI faces!
I’ve read some reviews where people had problems with Gandalf using major powers in Dol Guldur. Gandalf isn’t supposed to match power with power. As an istari, he is forbidden. And yet here, he appears to pull out some pretty big guns. But I don’t really see it that way. He uses a spell to reveal a glamour, and what appears to be some sort of force shield/bubble. The force shield itself is more like pure light that is holding off pure dark. That’s reasonable to me. If he used that spell on any other creature, it wouldn’t do much but brighten it up or maybe scare it away like he did with the ringwraiths outside of Minas Tirith.
One of the things I enjoyed the most was PJ’s inclusion of a completely invented character, Tauriel. It’s Kate from Lost playing an elf. I liked her a lot. Every time she was on screen and not fighting, she brought great emotional depth to a film that lacked great emotional depth. She is actually in it a lot, and though Legolas is in it just as much, his role felt like nothing more than a cameo next to hers. However, once she shows up, PJ starts changing the story. She and Kili begin this crazy elf/dwarf love-at-first-sight storyline that I have major issues with. I’m most conflicted with this, because it doesn’t feel forced. It feels right. And yet, it’s an ELF and a DWARF! Maybe I just need to let it go and accept that times are changing.
Laketown was so much more fully realized than I had ever imagined. I loved it! But once again, PJ strays far from the source material. Bard’s black arrow isn’t an arrow at all, but a harpoon. Bilbo doesn’t save the day by revealing Smaug’s one weak spot. Bard reveals this info to Bilbo. Four of the dwarves stay behind in Laketown while the rest go on to Erebor Yeah, they’ve come all this way facing death defying odds at every turn but now that they have made it practically to the doorstep, they stop. Who cares about seeing their ancestors home? Laketown is so much prettier this time of year with their fish and fog and animosity towards dwarves. Bofur stays behind because he slept in. Kili hurt his leg. Fili won’t go without Kili. And Oin is just….um….old?
Kili, by the way, is dying from being shot in the leg with an arrow. And the only ones who can save the day is Tauriel and Legolas. Plus Laketown gets invaded by orcs, so the elves get to do some more Matrix style killing.
And here is the thing that hurts me the most. Tauriel saves Kili with a handful of Kingsfoil. Kingsfoil? Aye, it’s a weed. Yep. The same stuff that Aragorn used to save Frodo in Fellowship of the Ring. In Fellowship, Arwen came to him after Aragorn administered the poultice and she looked all glowy and beautiful. I always assumed that was because Frodo was close to darkness and was now approached by an elf of the light – Elrond’s daughter, Galadriel’s granddaughter. Arwen is from a race of elves that has seen the light of the original sun and moon in the Blessed Realm (aka elf heaven). But guess what? Kili sees Tauriel in the same mystical glowy fashion. Tauriel is a lowly Sylvan elf. Their claim to fame is that they live Mirkwood. Technically, Thranduil and his son, Legolas, have some Sindarin in them which is a mix of light and dark elves. But Tauriel should be strictly Silvan – otherwise known as dark elves who haven’t seen the light of the Blessed Realm. That leaves me to conclude that Kili was just high, and Frodo was experiencing the same effects. But that’s not the part that kills me. Athelas, also known as Kingsfoil, is a common weed that has NO medicinal properties unless administered BY THE HANDS OF A KING. This is why Aragorn was able to heal Frodo with it. In the book, it is one of the major ways that he uses to prove that he is the true king. This is why people never thought of it as anything more than just a weed. So in PJs world, it is all over the place, but NOBODY knows it’s healing properties even though ANYONE can use it to heal? THIS MAKES NO SENSE and it’s the number one thing that frustrates me with this movie. Seriously. This is as bad as Lucas’ midichlorians. PJ moved too much stuff around on this perfectly stable tower just to make it his own, and this is the block that makes his Jenga tower topple.
The final 30 minutes involve not just Bilbo, but the dwarves entering Erebor and confronting Smaug. They create this huge overly elaborate plan to kill the dragon once and for all. It turns the dwarves into Matrix fighters as well, as they practically fly through the halls, coming close to meeting their end dozens of times. Thorin boogie boards down a river of molten gold. Finally, the gather all the molten gold together and cover Smaug with it. I’m not sure what it was supposed to do. Burn him? Nice try doing that to a heat proof dragon. Drown him? Well, he’s got wings so he just flies right out. Maybe they expected it to be more quick drying and turn him into some sort of golden gargoyle. But he just shakes it off like a wet dog. This whole final 30 minute sequence was the most boring part for me. It was all CGI and it just kept going on and on and on. Jumping down stairs, flying on ropes, crashing through walls. Fire, fire, fire. It sounds exciting, but it almost had me nodding off like I was watching the podrace from Phantom Menace. Noisy. Dark, except for blinding flashes of fire. And constant moving without really comprehending what was going on. When the movie finally concludes, it ends so abruptly that I was almost shocked. Action! Action! Action! And then roll credits. No quiet moment reflecting on the adventure or character growth.
I’m going to be seeing this a second time next week with my kids and my father-in-law. Typically, a second review will tell me how I really feel. I’ll get to judge the movie on its own merit instead of my expectations. I enjoyed Iron Man 3 more on my second viewing. On the other hand, I hated Phantom Menace and X-Men 3 even worse. As I think about watching it a second time, I feel excited. So I couldn’t have disliked it too much. And maybe after seeing the extended version, I will enjoy it even more. I remember having HUGE problems with Two Towers until I saw the extended version. Until then, don’t take my word for it. Go see the movie. Becky said she loved every minute of it.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)